I am feeling a little overwhelmed and am trying to write it out. I am currently sitting at the outer edges of a jungle which is in turn, on the outer edges of Rutland. 
fierce down by 'ere and
I am scared to enter this jungle because of what I might find in it. ...namely the lawnmower.
I have already located and isolated a trowel, but this was relatively easy due to its proximity to the house. It had been camouflaged by a particularly nasty patch of .......I can't remember the name. I knew it last year and every previous year but then again I have spent 2 days...in this my 50th year...thinking of the name for that dark brown stuff you put on lettuce..it's on my shopping list as 'salad vinegar' which I find somewhat distressing. Anyway, I hate these plants but they cover up my drain rather nicely which is why the trowel is there - duh! The prongs of the trowel are great for removing the grate bit of the drain in order to unblock it when all the bits of ......green stuff... have clogged it up, allowing soapy water to flow out and under the rotting doors of the garage. This happens because we need have need of a, but have no, drainage trench at the bottom of the sloping drive. The garage becomes the trench and everything in it becomes damp and rusty then perishes. However, this is definitely not the car, because someone put an ill advised vestibule on the side of the house and now the drive narrows just at the entrance to the garage rendering it superfluous to requirements unless you are parking
a) a sled
b) a bike
c)a scooter
d)a mobility scooter
e) a lawnmower (usually)
There are in fact several bikes and a scooter in there, all rusty, but we can't make use of them because the last time we went in mice (we hope) had eaten the handlebars of the scooter and no one is brave enough to go back in. We'll have to rig up some sort of a gazebo to protect the lawnmower now, if I ever get the grass cut. It's a chicken/egg situation. It's up to my knees now, the grass. Maybe Aidan Turner can come and scythe it for me.
I absolutely cannot face the strimmer. It is soul destroying switching the power off every two minutes to readjust orange wire that snaps or breaks free every 30 seconds, slices through your leg hair and slippers but cannot cope with the jungle. I really need a petrol blade but I can't afford it.
I AM HAPPY TO BE BRIBED WITH PRODUCT PLACEMENT! I WILL EVEN TAKE PHOTOS.
In fact, I have an idea....
I have ventured down the garden and given myself a right fright. I have taken pics of everything...and cried a bit! I intend to try and blog you the resulting improvements.
Best make a start...
Seed catalogue and power tool distributors or Aidan Turner, can contact me by leaving a comment below.
fierce down by 'ere andI am scared to enter this jungle because of what I might find in it. ...namely the lawnmower.
I have already located and isolated a trowel, but this was relatively easy due to its proximity to the house. It had been camouflaged by a particularly nasty patch of .......I can't remember the name. I knew it last year and every previous year but then again I have spent 2 days...in this my 50th year...thinking of the name for that dark brown stuff you put on lettuce..it's on my shopping list as 'salad vinegar' which I find somewhat distressing. Anyway, I hate these plants but they cover up my drain rather nicely which is why the trowel is there - duh! The prongs of the trowel are great for removing the grate bit of the drain in order to unblock it when all the bits of ......green stuff... have clogged it up, allowing soapy water to flow out and under the rotting doors of the garage. This happens because we need have need of a, but have no, drainage trench at the bottom of the sloping drive. The garage becomes the trench and everything in it becomes damp and rusty then perishes. However, this is definitely not the car, because someone put an ill advised vestibule on the side of the house and now the drive narrows just at the entrance to the garage rendering it superfluous to requirements unless you are parking
a) a sled
b) a bike
c)a scooter
d)a mobility scooter
e) a lawnmower (usually)
There are in fact several bikes and a scooter in there, all rusty, but we can't make use of them because the last time we went in mice (we hope) had eaten the handlebars of the scooter and no one is brave enough to go back in. We'll have to rig up some sort of a gazebo to protect the lawnmower now, if I ever get the grass cut. It's a chicken/egg situation. It's up to my knees now, the grass. Maybe Aidan Turner can come and scythe it for me.
I absolutely cannot face the strimmer. It is soul destroying switching the power off every two minutes to readjust orange wire that snaps or breaks free every 30 seconds, slices through your leg hair and slippers but cannot cope with the jungle. I really need a petrol blade but I can't afford it.
I AM HAPPY TO BE BRIBED WITH PRODUCT PLACEMENT! I WILL EVEN TAKE PHOTOS.
In fact, I have an idea....
I have ventured down the garden and given myself a right fright. I have taken pics of everything...and cried a bit! I intend to try and blog you the resulting improvements.
Best make a start...
Seed catalogue and power tool distributors or Aidan Turner, can contact me by leaving a comment below.
Cant see the photos PP :-( but I DO know that you have a love for gardening so even though it's a bit overwhelming right now you can make it beautiful again. Wish I lived nearer, SD and I could give you a hand AND get rid of those mice (I don't mind mice). I'm a little envious of your garden even if it is a jungle right now, mine is so tiny and mostly decking, easy to keep but not so good for adventuring! xx
ReplyDeleteHi Pam. Thanks for stopping by and leaving such a heartfelt comment. It really touched me. X
ReplyDelete