Wednesday, November 6, 2013

The Man on The Bus Part 1

I recently travelled from here to there on a bus, two trains and a tube. The last leg of the journey involved a replacement coach service. By the time that I There weren’t many seats  a single here and there. As I boarded, a man signalled to me before pointing eagerly to the chair next to him. ‘Sit here, sit here’ he said as though we were old friends on a magical mystery tour. I imagined jam sandwiches in tin foil heating through in his pocket. He looked a little older than me but not unattractive. A tad scruffy perhaps…fingerless gloves always have a touch of the Steptoe about them I think. He was wiry and bearded, with a beanie hat. If a hat of any description is worn by a man when it isn’t absolutely necessary (on a bus for example) it’s probably hiding baldness to a greater or lesser extent. Let me just tell you now gents, that you are worrying about nothing because we don’t really care. We don’t give a freaking or proverbial monkey’s about hair once we are past a certain age, because we are too busy worrying about whether the sexy bald guy has noticed the size of our arse. Give yourself and everyone else a break. The only chaps I know who actually suit hats, are young enough to have a full head of hair and only wear the hat to draw attention to it.

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